Missed Connections

I'm aware that this post will probably sound like i'm bragging about myself or being kinda cocky, when in fact that is so not my style. If you get sick of reading it, you can just not read it anymore. Isn't free will grand?


So, i've recently had a few conversations with some of my male friends that revealed that they previously (or currently) liked me as more than a friend. So far in this calendar year, i've had 3-4 of these missed connection conversations. I do enjoy the occasional, random, in-depth text conversation and oddly enough, that is how these conversations usually begin. I guess I can understand the comforting security of revealing such information via text. I tend to wonder (and sometimes I even ask) "Why me?" or more importantly "Why are you telling me now?" For some reason, these conversations always seem to happen at times when nothing can be done (read: one or both parties are in a relationship, someone is moving away, etc).  Let me clarify that i've never been upset with anyone for sharing their feelings with me, I absolutely welcome it. It helps me to understand the individual and let's be honest, it's just downright flattering. 


Being told that I was the object of someone else's affection was kinda exciting. Along with that, it can also be somewhat disappointing. Whenever i'm told such an exciting gem, I usually ask "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" (I know, I ask a lot of questions. If you don't ask, you wont know.) The most common answer i've heard: "I didn't think i'd have a chance with you."


At first, I was flattered. Then I was confused. After that, curious. More emotions followed but most recently, i've stayed between a combination of confusion and curiosity. I've been told that i'm intimidating and I guess I can understand that to an extent. That said, i'm just going to be me and everyone else will have to figure out a way to manage. For the most part, no one could or would tell me what the huge deterrent was...until today. In the interest of maintaining confidence, i'm keeping this one to myself. That and I don't think everyone else knows me well enough to have the same road block so I kinda wanna know what everyone else's deal is.


The weirdest part of this whole thing about these guys thinking they didn't have a shot with me is that i'd say about 95% of them were wrong. They didn't know because they didn't ask. Thinking about this makes me wonder how many people are missing out on so many things in life simply because they don't think they have a shot. You'll always miss 100% of the shots you don't take so live it up.